Here we are on another New Years' Eve. I am feeling grateful to be entering another new year but as usual thinking about the future always gives me some sense of anxiety. I think about all the bad in the world, all the people who didn't think today would be their last day on earth but it was. I think of the potential bad things that could happen to my loved ones or me. I don't know why I'm so glum, I guess I'm just afraid.
This year has been another great one filled with wonderful memories. Time sure does go by faster and faster every year, I swear. I changed career paths again this fall. I left my job working as a caretaker for the elderly and began working with children at a church on Sundays. I help run the nursery and take care of kids 0-4 years old. I also started working at Kindercare and have done a ton of work helping open a brand-new center. I was offered a position at a local preschool as an assistant teacher that I am supposed to start Jan 4th but I haven't heard much from them since I accepted the offer. I would be making more money and working more hours. I don't know how I am going to balance being a mom and working more and frankly, I don't feel excited about starting, only because I know how disappointing it will likely end up being. I know I shouldn't complain and should be grateful to have a job but I just feel eh.
Natalie turned 11 and I am grateful to celebrate another year with her. She's very into sports and is doing soccer, swim, cheer and basketball. She loved watching the world cup and is a huge Ronaldo fan. I got her and Matt tickets for Christmas to see the Wizards in January and she was so happy she cried. We had a good Christmas Eve with Matt's family and of course, the girl's got a ton of gifts. Christmas day was lowkey with my parents.
I found out today my dad's mom passed away last night. I haven't allowed myself to feel or think too deeply about it. I teared up when I told Natalie and cried a bit randomly when I was alone. I haven't seen my grandma since my wedding in 2011 and I wasn't close to her but I have fond memories from my childhood of her.
Anyway, despite the tone of this post, I am wishing you a happy new year! I hope you all have a great year ahead filled with love and joy. Take care.