That Time I Lit My Husband's Computer on Fire

Lately I have been trying to cook things more, mostly because I'm bored but also because it makes me feel like a better wife and mother.

I know, it's a stupid validation and I'm still a terrible wife.

Last night I wanted to make a sauce to go along with the tacos I planned on burning for dinner.

I needed the recipe in the kitchen with me and had it pulled up on my husband's computer. I placed the computer on the stove and read the directions while prepping everything.

 I was adamant about making this sauce delicious so I paid attention to every step intently. I threw some vegetables in a pan and added some spice.

I turned the stove on and began stirring things around. I felt like I was on Top fucking Chef. Veggies were cooking, aromas were flowing through the air...

Then Matt walks by and is like, "Don't leave that there!" or something along those lines.

Before I could question why he was yelling at me he grabbed his laptop, which was on fire, and put it out.

I had left it on the stove, right by the burner that I was cooking the sauce on.

I have never felt so dumb in my life.

 I've also never been more sure that Matt loves me, because he didn't try to murder me afterwards.

Luckily there wasn't much damage done. His computer still works and just a small piece on the very front is melted.

I still can't get over what a jackass I am, but I guess we all make mistakes. Mine are just at the expense of others and could potentially kill us if not caught in time.

Because I'm awesome

 

Wordless Wednesday

Someone is a big fan of the stupid hairdo's I make her wear!

Night Owl

I'm going to be really surprised if I can form enough coherent sentences right now to make an actual post.

I thought about just typing fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck over and over again just to get it out of my system but I've mellowed out a bit since that thought crossed my mind.

This is the first time in a long time that I've been completely stressed out by my child.

 I get it, parenthood is crazy. There is no predictable part of a baby's schedule, no matter how much you think you have it down.

Life is all about sacrifices now.

Natalie's sleeping habits have been all over the goddamn place though and it's driving me insane.

For the past few nights she's been going to bed really late. Between 10:30 pm-1:00 am. I'm not going to go into talking a whole lot about what I thought was her typical sleep schedule, but she usually went to bed at nine.

I can deal with waking up a few times a night to feed her. I can handle having to force myself out of bed earlier then I'd like to in the mornings. I can't deal with her staying awake until one in the morning, while I have to be at work the next day, bright and early.

I've had a really long day. I know I should be sleeping as it's close to midnight now but I need to vent and have a little "me" time.

Again, I get the whole, world revolving around your child crap. That doesn't mean I can't get emotionally distressed every once in awhile.

I am certain no one is going to offer me any miraculous advice (is chloroform safe for babies?) but if you think you can help then be my guest and share your insights.

If you don't have any tips, don't feel bad. We're having some friends over tomorrow for a cookout and I'm planning on drinking my ass off.

That always helps me get through rough patches and sleep a bit better at night.

Cheers!

Wordless Wednesday

We're pretty sure Natalie is going to get her height from Matt, so we've started training her how to ball already. ;)

Happy Wednesday! Hope you all have a great week. 

Wedding Retake: Shoes

Since my ceremony was outdoors in the grass, I contemplated what type of shoes I should wear. I really wanted to wear flats but my husband is 6'7" and I'm 5'4" so I thought I should add some height so we’d look less ridiculous together.

I pondered if I should purchase high heels or wedges. Again, I considered what would work best in the grass. I didn't want the heel to sink into the ground but I don't really like wedges and my ankles tend to roll in them.

I also wanted to do something a little fun and colorful. I made up my mind and ordered a pair of heels from the internet. I loved them. They were pink peep toes with little roses on the front. I had my dress altered so it would cut off at just the right point in those shoes.

The day before my wedding I wore some heels to our rehearsal. As I practiced walking down the imaginary aisle my foot began to sink into the grass. It was awkward and embarrassing as the whole wedding party watched me struggle to get my foot out of the soft ground and then finally just kick the damn things off of me.

I knew the shoes I purchased wouldn’t work for the big day unless I basically tiptoed my way to the alter. I went to bed not having a clue what I was going to do, but I was too tired to care. It would work itself out in the end, even if I had to walk barefoot. 

I had a pair of aqua blue wedges that I thought might be a good option, so the next day I tried them on. They were really uncomfortable. I didn't want to wear them.

My friend/bridesmaid brought me some options from her closet. I can't remember what any of them looked like except the pair I went with.

The one's I chose were hideous. I think I picked them because they seemed comfy. They were white, beat up sandals with a slight inclined heel. Fortunately my dress covered them most of the wedding. From time to time they would peek through my dress when I was walking around. I prayed everyone was too busy staring at my giant, pregnant boobs to notice my feet though.

I have only one photo of the shoes I wore because there's no way in hell I wanted to remember them for any reason. I put on the shoes I was initially going to wear right before we took portraits and the photographer snapped a shot as my friend was helping me out.

You can't tell how awful they are from the picture, and I considered taking an up close shot since they're still sitting in my shoe ottoman (go figure, she didn't want them back) but I decided against that.

I was comfortable though and  probably would have just tripped and fallen over in the cutesy pink shoes anyway.

So what did your wedding shoes look like? Did you love them or not?

*Shiver* What I wore

What I was suppose to wear/would wear now

pink wedding shoes I never wore

Someone Praise Me

Nothing says summer quite like s'mores.

I'm planning on hosting an end of summer bbq next weekend and decided homemade s'mores would be a perfect finish to a wonderful summer.

You seriously don't understand how culinary challenged I am. For real. I'm proud of myself when I microwave Easy Mac and don't screw it up.

Not even joking.

You can imagine the challenge I faced when deciding to make graham crackers from scratch.

I found the recipe in Martha Stewart Living magazine. I was like, "Holy shit, those are the most adorable s'mores I've ever seen. I need to make them despite my inability to make even the most simple of recipes."

And I fucking did.

The only thing I alternated about this was the cookie cutter. In the magazine they used a three inch square flutter cutter. I couldn't find even a plain square cookie cutter anywhere so I improvised.

What else is square?

Natalie's building blocks.

Worked out pretty well. Gotta say I'm pretty proud of myself!

  

What you'll need:

1 1/2 cups all purpose flour

1 cup whole wheat flour

1/2 cup toasted wheat germ

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon ground cinomon

2 sticks unsalted butter, softened

2 tablespoons honey

3 inch square cookie cutter, or, in my case your childs block

1 1/2 inch star cutter

Chocolate

Marshmallows

Directions:

 Whisk together flours, wheat germ, salt, baking soda, and cinnamon. 

Beat together butter, sugar, and honey with a mixer on medium speed until pale and fluffy. Reduce speed to low. Add flour mixture; beat until combine.

Put dough in the refrigerator until firm, about ten minutes.

Roll dough out to 1/8th of an inch and cut with square cutter or object. Cut star in the center. Place squares on cookie sheet and bake in oven on 350 degrees for about 15 minutes.

Let cool, roast marshmallows, add chocolate and feel it heading straight to your thighs! Totally worth the calories. 

My cookie cutter.

Ready to bake

Wordless Wednesday

Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr...

Happiness

Happiness to me is...

Spending an hour making my baby a homemade rice pudding that I think she'll really enjoy, only to have her want to mush it around and eat the bowl instead.

Happiness to me is...

Knowing no step is too hard to climb, no matter how small you are.

Happiness to me is...

Letting my baby play in the rain, then chase a strange cat down the alley because it makes her smile.

Happiness to me is...

Her. 

This little girl is the center of my world. I love spending every single moment of my day with her, from sun up to sundown. She has been such a joy lately and has been so happy.

Today I made her a tasty little treat that she wasn't too interested in. It was a peach rice pudding and I thought she would really like it. She was unimpressed. It did make her really happy to play with it though. She kept looking up at me a giving me the biggest smiles as she smeared it everywhere. Well worth the hour spent slaving over the stove.

 I thought it would be fun to venture into DC to run on the bike path so we hopped on the metro. Little did I know that there was no way to get to the path from the station. We went back home and walked up the the Masonic Temple instead. Natalie had a lot of fun there and wanted to climb up the stairs. She is so independent and ready to take on the world.

We then spent some time at Matt's parents house and ate dinner there. Afterwards we headed home and played on the deck as it began to rain. She loves the water so much. A cat was wandering around in the alley and Natalie got so excited. We followed it around trying to get close but it kept running away.

 Daddy came home and we had some more family and play time before bath and bedtime. She's now sleeping peacefully while I type away.

I love my life more than I could ever explain. I don't give a shit how boring my days sound to anyone else. This is the most amazing time and I so look forward to each new adventure we experience together.

Fitness Friday

I haven't done a Fitness Friday in awhile and that's because I have not been keeping up with my goals to get in better shape.

I fell off the wagon and it was hard getting back on it. I know I'm not where I want to be. I know all the obvious things like I'm not going to lose weight without putting in hard work. It is just so hard to stay motivated.

I'm taking steps to get back in the right direction though. I've cut calories and finally started using our jogging stroller for jogging. I always thought that eating whatever the fuck I wanted made me happy but now that I'm eating better I feel happier.

I love going running with Natalie and we've done it every day this week (except today since I work until eight). This is pretty much the first time I've ever gone jogging in public and I'll admit I feel pretty awkward. I think I run like an idiot and from the way people look at me they definitely agree.

I'm glad I'm getting things started again but I really wish I hadn't given up in the first place and started this earlier. I have a long road ahead of me but I know it will be worthwhile in the end. 

Joggin' stroller babe.

Work-out buddies.

Life is Good

This most likely is going to sound a little fake and sugar coated, but this past week all I have been doing is enjoying time spent with baby girl.

 I probably shouldn't let it affect me so much, but her mood definitely influences mine. Her tooth has finally broken through the gum and she has been in much better spirits lately. That makes me a happy mama.

She is learning so much everyday. Today she climbed two steps all by herself. She's also been very sweet and gave me a bunch of baby kisses today. Maybe they weren't so much kisses as it was her licking my face but it was still nice.

I really think she's starting to pick up on little words too. We'll put her in her car seat carrier and she'll start getting fussy. We then say that we're going bye-bye and she'll calm down. Could be coincidental but who knows? 

This weekend we went to a friends house for a play date and Natalie had a good time. She played with two other babies and enjoyed some different toys too. There was a little lawn mower looking walker thing that she actually took a few steps with all on her own.

I am so proud of this little girl. I absolutely love my simple little life and couldn't ask for a thing.

Balancing act

Little cruiser

Block time

Since day one she makes this face where she sucks in her bottom lip.

Eight Months

Today my little girl is eight months old! I’m proud to say she has reached some incredible milestones in the past few weeks.

First on the list is crawling.

Although she's been able to get around by wiggling on her belly, she was not able to crawl before. She has a hilarious way of doing it too. It's not the typical on hands and knees crawl. Instead she puts one foot on the ground, moves it forward and then drags the other foot like she's an injured animal. Her first official crawl date was July 29th.

Standing.

I may be giving her too much credit in this department but a few times she has let go of our hands when she’s standing and balanced herself quite well. It only lasts a few seconds but I am impressed. Once she gets her balance down I am confident she’ll start walking.

Teething.

I’ve literally thought month after month that she was teething. This time I’m positive she definitely maybe possibly is. Really though, we can feel a tooth under her gums about to break through. She's also had a runny nose, no fever though and been insanely cranky on a few days.

Solids.

I said last months how I thought I was going to have the worlds pickiest eater, but she has really warmed up to her baby food. She's tried a lot of different fruit and veggie mush. So far she really likes sweet potatoes. She also has had some real solid foods, like apples, peaches, bananas, prunes, a pickle and and I'm pretty sure she swallowed a tiny piece of paper she was tearing apart before I could pull it out of her mouth. Makes me look like a great mom, I know.

Sleep

We're still waking up a few times a night to eat. She doesn't have a set bedtime, though she usually goes to bed around nine. What's kinda weird is that it doesn't matter what time she falls asleep, she still wakes up in the morning at the same time.She can fall asleep at eight thirty or eleven thirty and she's up and ready to go at the same time each morning.

Other than that she still loves holding our hands and practice walking. She has a little walker and trucks around my in laws house like nobody’s business. She absolutely hates sitting and if there’s anything to pull herself up on then she does it the second you put her on the ground. She wears me out a lot and things can get stressful, but she's so worth it.

Happy eight months Natalie. You are such a sweet little babe.

Rock-a-Bye

When Natalie was a newborn I loved how much she slept during the day. Not only because I had the freedom to do what I wanted around the house (watch Maury), but because she would let me cradle and snuggle her.

As she started to sleep less and less I realized how fun it was to have a baby with more personality.

She still needs her beauty rest but is now slowly beginning to phase out day time naps. She usually takes two naps a day and most the time her naps occur at or around the same time each day.

For months it's been a struggle to get her to sleep. We've done so many different things to get her to bed, which include rocking, singing, car rides and swinging her to sleep.

At some point or another she gets sick of one method and we have to switch it up.

Lately she has this new thing where the best way to get her to sleep is by laying her down, giving her a blanket and bottle and turning on the weather channel. Yep, the weather channel.

It shows the local and regional weather, plays instrumental music and occasionally says something like, "Your current forecast."

Within minutes she's knocked out.

Can't say I'm complaining about it, I just think it's a little strange.

 What's the weirdest thing you've done to get your baby to sleep?

Wordless Wednesday

My niece Bridget and Natalie wearing matching outfits. That's either really cute or really gay. You decide.

Happy Wednesday!